We Lost

I don’t know exactly what we were trying to win.
Maybe we wanted to teach Russia how to colonize not only Afghanistan but also Iraq to boot. Well, we didn’t. We showed the world that the assessment, back when the U.S.S.R. fell, was the correct assessment.
Maybe we wanted oil, well we didn’t get it. We got an economy looted before our very eyes, in much the same manner as curators from Baghdad’s ancient museums watched relics and artworks that have survived for millenia, crushed to smithereens or sold on Ebay.
Maybe we wanted to bring democracy (sponsored by WalMart, Home Depot, Halliburton, Burger King, Black Hawk, Disney, GE, Exxon, Kellogg, Brown and Root, Microsoft and Starbucks) to those poor ol’ Muslims who invented civilization 4,000 years ago.
In any case, we lost.

Yes, I am the New York Times. I am CNN. I have millions of blogoreaders across the blogosphere and you heard it here first.
The brutal occupation of Iraq is over.
Our troops must be out of Iraq by December, 2011. All troops in cities, towns and villages must leave by June, 2009. The Green Zone is to be handed over to the Iraqi government practically immediately. Best of all! Private contractors (a.k.a. Dick Cheney’s best pals) will no longer have legal immunity, so everyone who murders tortures and/or rapes Iraqi folks or women associated with the occupation from now on will actually face some kind of penalty.
This seems like big news to me.
In the rest of the world it’s big news.

So there you have it. All the protests, all the petitions, all the articles and essays and organizations that started in outrage of this brual occupation have been vindicated.
There were no weapons of mass destruction
There was no democracy-bringing.
There wasn’t even a war.
There was a shameful, brutal occupation.
Millions of people died, were illegally incarerated or lost their homes. Millions of people can now officially able to be diagnosed with post traumatic stress disorder (which is a lot more luxurious than on-going traumatic stress disorder).
It’s over.
George Bush and his pals will lose a little face, but they made so much money off this shit, the point of “winning” or “losing” never entered those bitches consciousness.
If they aren't tried for war crimes then I might have to become a terrorist.
The people of Iraq lost a lot.
We lost too, but what exactly we lost will only come to light when the Iraqi people begin the arduous process of rebuilding their country.
Allah be with us all.

Thanks to Alexander Cockburn at Counterpunch for letting me know it was over. Here is his article, entitled: "It's Official: Total Defeat for the U.S. in Iraq."

http://www.alternet.org/waroniraq/112768/it%27s_official%3A_total_defeat_for_u.s._in_iraq/

P.S. Bush did not go there for a "farewell lap." He went there to get shoes thrown at him and to sign the papers saying "You failed, you miserable piece of shit."